tickets to the gun show
one of my most favorite pictures... my dad makes the sitting-rope-climb look easy. check out those shoulders, dang!
(click to enlarge)

crash, bang, boom
in a period of a little over a week, life has changed in some very significant ways. for one, i got into a little fender-bender last week, causing my car and my record to look less than perfect (i maintain that it was definitely not my fault, but it seems that they had to blame it on SOMEone). i'm fine, but repairs to the bst*r-mobile will have to be postponed for a bit while i figure out the result of life alteration #2, which is my roomie had to suddenly move out, leaving me with a 2bd/2ba place all to my own. i've been debating for a while if on my own is where i am supposed to be anyway, but i wasn't ready to face that decision quite yet. so now i'm juggling insurance and realtors, and life and life and life.

whatever keeps it interesting, right?

on the totally and completely upside, i just made a really cute shirt, i'm getting to know all about hockey (and family camp?!) and i am currently sitting on a couch with 2 kittens and a dog contentedly lounging on my various appendages, a set-up that could make even the most dismal times seem just a little warmer.
ps - lost my voice, please send back if found. thankyousomuch.
current mood: ehh, it'll all work out eventually

more than meets the eye
i came to a great sort of "ah-ha!" at work that made me feel good about being here. i have spent the last couple of weeks shadowing and absorbing, learning by proxy almost. i like to be hands-on and breaking things, b/c then at least i can learn through error and experience. but i hadn't had a lot of chance to do that due to the facts that a) everything is real-time, and i can't just go around fiddling with it, and b) playoffs caused a number of fires to spring up, cutting training time to an abrupt end while the scramble to fix things took over. i was, however, not completely idle, as i was given small tasks to do... things that i didn't necessarily fit into my job descrip, so why were they given to me? for example, i was asked to create a small market survey on an upcoming program we're developing, leaving layout to me and content to the gurus fueling the change. i realized today, after being given another one of these mini-projects, that i was hired for more than what i volunteered at the interview... i'm viewed as sort of in-the-know when it comes to communications, and have been given the opportunity to use my creative skills at will, despite that element being noticibly absent from the position description. that realization is invigorating, and i'm renewed with excitement about this new chapter in my life.
current mood: time to be creative!

apparently
i have a lot to say today...

figure me out
i'm struggling a little bit with my purpose behind this little online world of mine. every time i'm made aware of whose eyes are on these public private thoughts, i share a little less, censor a little more and leave only veiled messages that some people can decode instantly, and some people think i'm just nuts. i'm the kind o' girl who releases things that are bugging me by putting it out there... things in my head are figured, well, out of my head that way. so what do i do? be completely open and risk stepping on some toes, but at least i'll feel better? or continue with the self-editing, rise a little more to the superficial, and find an alternative outlet?

is it me, or...
...is it kinda rude to tell someone all about the dinner party you are throwing, and all about what you're serving, etc, and not invite the person you're telling it all to? i suppose it's contextual, but in this specific instance, i had to think "why are you telling me all this?"
current mood: well now i'm thinking about dinner

requiem for a scooter
i am grateful that monica had the good helmet on. despite everything else that happened when her little scooter met a much bigger car, her head is too valuable to be messed with.
so i'm not very good at hospitals or with sickness. i'm sure there's a story behind that, but i don't really want to delve too deep into my psyche to advertise it here. visiting with monica in the hospital was super hard the first time; i hated to see her out of it and in so much pain. it's a little better now; she's got a long way to go on the way to recovery, but at least i still see that same roomie-sass in her eyes.
current mood: thinking good thoughts

but... but... i'm like totally japanese!
i was at sushi-ya last night, actually run by japanese people, had offered a few pleasantries in the language, totally had the j-vibe going... and in the middle of dinner, the waitress brings me a knife and fork. no, i didn't ask for them, and no, i wasn't the only white person there. i was so shocked; have my chopsticks skills really gone that awry?
i did manage to chotto redeem myself as we were leaving the restaurant and i gave a hearty gochisoosamadeshita! (thanks for the feast!) and every japanese head in the place sprang up with surprise, and all of a sudden the place erupted in all sorts of cheerfully loud japanese greetings. that probably would have been a good time to ask what was up with the cutlery...
current mood: sheesh, how embarrassing

scurvy aside...
if yo ho means totally wicked awesome in buccaneer language, well, then, i would have to say it's a pirate's life for me.
current mood:

shady deals
i did something yesterday that concerned, worried, and right out scared a few of the strong protective men-type in my life.

i bought an iPod.

okay, maybe that part's not so scary. perhaps it was the fact that i met the seller of this alleged musical device in the dimly lit parking lot of a not-known-for-it's-spectacular-safety-record department store. i think *that* may have actually been the cause for concern...
current mood: now i'm musically chic & mobile-y sleek

whoever said the holidays are busy hasn't seen my january
halfway through the month already, and i feel as sluggish as the day after christmas. my calendar is an agglomeration of color from my attempt to code the different activities layered across it... i'm amazed at how quickly my life goes from 0 to 60 when it seems to me that i'm not driving at all!
current mood: when did it get so chilly 'round here?

sex phonics
i'm surrounded by people having sex. i'm not saying that to point out that everyone seems to be having sex; quite literally the neighbors on (almost) all sides of me are having sex, like all the time. i guess that's what i get for being so un-sleepy.

personally, i would like my place of residence to be a quiet sanctuary. somewhere where i can be the one choosing to interrupt the peace; i tend to get annoyed when others are making that decision for me. but in my current situation, i don't get that choice, so i need to figure out what's worse: being woken up at all hours of the night by wall-thumping, seemingly unending musical shell that tries to envelope the sounds of the throes of passion, or being woken up at all hours of the night by the sounds of the throes themselves. i did a little research, and in fact, it turns out i am under no legal, political, social or religious moral to ever know that the lady upstairs fakes it. despite my reprieve, and the brevity of those particular episodes, i still can't escape it.

so what's the lesser evil? earplugs don't seem to work; they tend to drown out the sound of my alarm, but let through every other sound in the world. and though i've done it before for the ridiculous house-parties, i would feel rather bad (karma and all) about calling the police on the music players. at least they're trying. so, the question is, what to do? what to do? tell 'em to knock it off (eh, i couldn't do that. i'm of the "good for them!" school of thought.) install giant noise cancelling speakers? ...
... move??
current mood: thoughtful

eventide
i'm warning you now, the subject of this post will prove to be quite boring. that's kind of the point. my new work schedule has required me to shift my normal operating hours back by about an hour. now that may not seem like a lot, but it's throwing me off so much that i've been walking around in a bit of a haze.

i've decided that i need something to do to keep myself on schedule. i've been trying to stay up later to compensate for the later mornings, but when it comes down to it, i'm a bouncy little ball the earlier it is. when it hits 9:30 at night, my body is ready for sleepy dreamtime. so i've been trying to do all the things that should keep me awake: caffeine, exercise, mind games (in a logic/puzzle sort of way, not so much as a relationship/conflict sort). they're all knocking me out.

i'm looking forward to the time when i can actually come in early to work and do stuff when i know i'm most productive. i like sitting in the quiet office early in the morning, watching the fog roll around the coronado bridge... what do you think is the likelihood of me convincing everyone else 'round here to show up earlier? yeah, i think "slim and none" too.

so i'm looking for something to do, something that isn't just on me (i'm not individually motivated, i like group instruction) and something that's early morning. the suggestion box is officially open...

current mood: i'm awfully yawn-y these days

now if the rest of you would be so kind as to get lost
blame it on my astrological sign, but i have the tendency to wonder and worry if i should lose sight of certain people who have touched my little world. the more lost they are, the more i seek a sign of their life. remember charlie? that's a great example of absence makes the heart grow fonder.

so is it fate that i've managed to run into all but one of my long-lost friends, or is it a matter of time, designated school reunions aside? personally, i'd like to give it to fate that led me to start clicking through strangers' profiles on myspace, leading me to the last (and dare i say most missed) one to be found? my dear old friend jey, the reason i cried at graduation because i knew deep down it was going to be a while before i could connect with him again, is found again. as much as i reject the idea of these online communities for their vanity and garish attributes, i do hold them with an element of appreciation... i think i'll call it the jey-factor.

current mood: life is good

ay-em mayhem
i just logged in to work... please note the time below and adjust your sympathies accordingly.
current mood: wicked tired

worse than nails on a chalkboard
somebody PLEASE! make the weird cartoon-y voices STOP! i can't take it anymore!! please note: details have been omitted to protect the annoying

current mood: i'm thisclose to losing it

what the crack?
since i'm a downtown girl now, i have to park in a local parking structure, and so far it's been nothing but trouble. my pass to let me in and out of the structure hasn't been working, so there has been many a backing up and pulling into the lane with the attendant, accompanied by many a trip to the office to get things straightened out. as luck would have it, the pass actually worked yesterday (yay!) and i felt a sense of accomplishment as the little gate opened up to let me pass onto the ramp out. the design of this exiting area is really quite horrid as the path of the monthly-pass-holders (that's me) and the path of the everyone-elses converges immediately after the little booth onto one ramp to get to the street. as it turns out, there was a car in the everyone-else lane that was a little ahead of me, so i hung back a moment to let it get onto the ramp first.

and that's when it happened...

CRACK! the gate came crashing down onto my windshield. from where it hit, it's obvious that i was already well on my way out, so apparently they have no sensors to tell if i've completed that little passage or (very obviously) not. from where i was sitting, there was no way for me to get out and get the gate off my car, or re-swipe my pass or anything. instead, i looked back at the attendant for some sort of indication that she was going to hit the button to lift the gate and let me out. nope, nothin' doin'. her jolly clueless face shouted, "it's fine! just keep going!" seeing as i had no choice, i inched forward slowly, watching the thinly padded underside of the gate drag up my window and heard it scrape across my roof... great. i figured it would get stuck on my antennae, but i was wrong, it slid right down the back window... and got caught on my spoiler. the sound of something splintering made me slam on my breaks and wiggle out of the car. jolly-clueless girl was still encouraging me to keep going, while her co-hort was picking up the broken gate off my car. "don't worry! we've got a replacement! have a great night!" it was too dark for me to see what had happened to my car, but this morning showed clearly the path and final resting place of that gate through my super-white paint.

current mood: grr

and so it starts...
as much as i hate to admit it, i'm increasingly more dependant on having a computer. i haven't had access on my week off since a) i'm not at work, and b) my roomie took hers on her yosemite excursion. i would like to think that she would have left that behind for the sake of really getting in touch with nature, but i can't escape personal motivation on that one.

so i know you're all dying to know... the first day of work went well, though i was actually lacking a computer at my desk. ironic, considering my job is pretty web-based. i took care of all the usual paperwork fun-ness, toured around to meet a bunch of people whose names i forgot immediately (perhaps a new year's resolution in disguise?) and sat in some meetings where i surprisingly kept pace with the heavy industry-laden lingo flying about. that part made me feel a lot better, though i am well aware of the amount of learning still ahead of me. it looks like i'm going to fit in well here, the downtown girl in me is happy, and apparently they have bagel/donut fridays, so you can't beat that!

akemashite omedetoo gozaimsu/happy new year, all, may it be filled with peace and exciting new-ness for you too.
current mood: workin' hard fo' the money