shagisfy
It's that time of year! One of my least favorites! Actually, I'll use most any excuse to dress up; my friend Daniel throws excellent theme parties. But there's a difference between theme parties and Halloween, and it mostly comes down to public perception. It seems as if Halloween is a time to let loose and do whatever, and although that may not sound like a bad idea, it usually involves a lot of irresponsibility in my eyes. For example, I doubt that any one would think it cool if some guy came up to you in a bar, picked you up and carried you away on just any given day. But on Halloween, it seems to perfectly acceptable behavior... what?! Uh, no, not so much. So for my own safety, or rather, the safety of others (any stranger finding themselves overcome by the uncontrollable urge to pick me up, well, I cannot guarantee their safety), I think I might stay home tonight, settle my head, etc. I did get to go to work decked out a-go-go... literally. We changed our department into an Austin Powers type disco lounge, and my brilliant addition was to rename our Customer Satisfaction department to Customer SHAGisfaction. Awww yeah. Every time I said "Shag-isfaction", I had to giggle. (In a throwback to Clarence Carter, I wanted to call it "Sass-ifaction" but even though it would make me laugh equally hard, it wouldn't have made sense).

This past week cancelled my usual after-work activities and I found myself with a lot of time on my hands. Although the majority of it was spent at work (what the?!), I found the rest of the time relaxing but kinda lonely. Last weekend messed with my head a bit, and I'm guessing getting back into the routine will probably be the best medicine for me right now. But after taking this weekend off too, I think. I deserve it. ; )

Oh, and a tip of the hat for ingenuity extended to a certain East Coaster who realized I work at a call center that has an 800-number and we could catch up for free!... just say no to long distance phone bills!!

makin' desense outta deworld
I know that 49 1/2 states outta the country aren't necessarily affected by the goings ons around here. And it seems as the air gets clearer over here, the attention gets thinner as well. I know that I had tears streaming down my face as I listened to the helplessness in announcers' voices as they told of the latest destruction (think of the significance and impact of the words "Cuyamaca is gone." GONE. As if it never existed. But worse, because it's now a black, charred existence. It's devastating, and I'm not even connected to it intrinsically). Yesterday we had to return to work and return to placating the needy whines of people missing a coupon for free bag of food. The perspective of the situation was hard to swallow from those of us here, and when we had to answer messages left by people literally screaming at us "where the f*@$ are you?! This corporation doesn't care, the customer means nothing, you guys are a bunch of (insert favorite descriptive expletive here) and I'm now going to be a customer of (insert favorite competitive pet store here)!!" it was difficult not to yell back. Most people we called back were pretty nice about it; I had a few people riddled with guilt about the nasty message they left before they realized why we weren't there to kiss their feet. And it was nice to have that outlet of sympathy and people asking questions about it.

But today... today is different. Today people don't give a flying bag of food what's going on in the world around me, only what's going on in the world around them. It's as if they've become desensitized to the devastation. And while I'm in no better of a place in processing everything that's going on, the sympathy is short in coming. There are other things going on, I understand this. But a little patience is all I'm asking... otherwise "NO FOOD FOR YOU!" ((and for you compassionate East Coasters (and clueless locals), here's a start)):

In response to the devastation wrought by the fires that continue to rage through Southern California, PETCO stores and PETCO.com have begun to collect donations to benefit the many shelters working to assist the pets and families affected by this disaster. Please help us help the animals of San Diego County by making a generous donation online (http://www.petco.com) or in your local PETCO store.

but i did not inhale.
OHMYGOSH I can almost see blue sky! Yippeeyaywoohoo!

house arrest
Getting into my car this morning was a lot like what I imagine it would be like living in a snow globe. The entire ride from my house to work involved the swirling of little white (and gray and black) flakes about my head. Of course it also involved suffocating smoky air and a glaring red sun... not so much an idyllic land often represented in those little shaker globes. In case you've been living outside of SoCal this weekend you might be surprised to learn the land is ablaze with, at one point, no less than 6 fires in San Diego alone. Considering this is 5 times more fires than the same thing that happened 10 years ago, the media seemed to be a little more attentive. This also means that I spent the entire weekend with one hand on the remote and one hand on the phone, waiting for the "We be gettin' the hells outta here" call from my parents. Thankfully my bro and sis were both outta town this weekend; not only did this mean that my parents had somewhere to run to that was relatively close to them and not being licked by flames, but it also limited the amount of panicky worriers needing to be dealt with. The only other challenge to figure out would be where to put the animals. The 2 dogs and bird and mom and dad all live great under their own roof, but throw in a fat cat named Sylvan and no backyard, and you've got trouble. Thankfully it didn't come down to our own little Animal Planet documentary, but the threat was there. But things are good now, if you consider thick black smoke, falling embers, and the general smell of "cajun style" in the air "good", that is.

well really, who can argue with this?

CANCER (June 22-July 22). Your powers of attraction are turned way up, due mostly to your eccentricities. Potential friends and loved ones will notice that you are a freedom-loving, pleasure-seeking creature who marches to your own beat.

wookin' pa nub in all da wong pwaces

WANTED: attractive, fun, (straight!) male companion for various activities including but not limited to dancing, excursions, general goofing-off. Humor and flexibility a must. Hours required: Fridays after 4, Saturdays after noon, Sundays. On call availability a plus.

I'm only slightly aware of my audience (ie who reads this) and even with that limited knowledge, I find myself editing what goes down here because of who may be interpreting it. As much as I enjoy my time in the spotlight, I am a pretty private person, and with no blatant cultural oddities to comment on, I turn to the next most readily available subject matter: my own oddities. Now there's a fun topic. And inescapably, I am hesitant to put myself out there for whatever amount of scrutiny, criticism, and perhaps even sympathy that might come up as a reaction to my now public inner thoughts. It's a risk, it's an opening of vunerability (who, me??), but maybe it's a way to help me sort things out...

Lately I've been mulling over that whole "relationship" issue. People all around me are dating (last week Sil and D both went on dates, this week I know 2 people going on blind dates... the madness is everywhere!) and me? not so much. Admittedly, it's 98% my fault. For one thing, I've got some crazy hours: the alarm goes off at 5:30am, Mon-Friday, and I'm lucky if I get home before 9:30pm. I spend about 4 hours a day in transit, and the rest of the time at work, Japanese, karate, or sleeping. At least I get an hour lunch break. But the busybusybee-ness is part of the bigger excuse. I'm incredibly picky and not ashamed to say it, though some well-meaning persons in my life insist my standards are set too high. In some aspects of my life, I might agree with them, but when it comes to this, I stand by my standards. And although I've only met 2.5 (that's two-point-five, not twenty-five) boys that meet these standards (I've decided Turkish Boy doesn't get full count, despite his marriage proposal) in my 24 years, i don't think I'm selling myself short.

Now I suppose the disunion in my head comes from the part of me that would love to have someone to spend time with (for all intents and purposes, we'll label that borderline-hopless-romantic part of me "heart") arguing against the part of me that is fully aware that I have no time to commit to any sort of 'relationship' entity (that practical side we'll label as "head"). And thus it comes down to the classic battle of heart vs. head, and at any time of the day, any day of the week, it's impossible to predict which will be winning the battle. Do I shrug my shoulders, supporting Head's logic that I have other things to occupy myself with and therefore couldn't consider asking someone else to try and roll with all that. Or do I sigh about not being able to placate Heart's desire to share the (down) time with someone ... ?

TOO.
2 = the number of boxes of tissues I have gone through in the past 24 hours.
2 = the number of rolls of toilet paper I went through in the past 24 hours once I ran out of tissues.

what a girl wants vs. what a girl gets
I've always wanted to try blonde hair, and have never been able to achieve it for one reason or another (remember the orange and pink hair debacle of Korea?). I decided that I would finally go to a salon and have a professional do it. Afterall, who'd be a better authority on how to dye a brown head blonde than someone in Southern California? Unfortunately, the lady I went to loved my natural color so much (she called over everyone in the place to ooh and ahh over it) that she didn't want to "ruin" it, and instead put blonde STREAKS in it. Little did I know this was going on until my sister came in and asked "I thought you were going to dye it all blonde?" Yeah, I thought so too, but apparently not so much. I'm glad Ms. Colorist adored my au naturale-ness; I rather dig it too. But what ever happened to "the customer is always right"? Working in Customer Service, I know that's not always the case, but when it comes to stuff like this, that idiom should hold true... And before you ask, yes, i did pay for it. I'm a big weenie when it comes to that.

Irony settles in when I realize that things that I truly want never seem to come through for me in quite the satisfactory way, but things I can subtley suggest about wanting happen for me = no problem. Tatoeba (for example), I needed to know what kind of oil to use for upkeep of my karate bo, so I resourcefully marched down the street to an antiques shop approximately 50 steps from my front door, bo in hand, and asked the muscle-y men inside. 3 of them sprung to my rescue, one of them swiftly took the bo from me, and in about 30 seconds I was walking back down the street with a newly oiled bo in my hand. Now that's service. Today I was able to convince the construction men to sneak into our department and repaint the walls where we got a little rambunctious with our rolly chairs. They didn't have to do it, but they did.

Now if only I could find a hair-person to bend to my whim like this. But my guess is they wouldn't be operating under the same motivation, if you know what i mean...

this may sound snotty, but...
i would like to put it out there that I am definitely not attracted to middle-aged men with big handlebar mustaches, a greasy hat tipped back from the forehead so the big bushy ball of brown hair peeking out matches the patch growing out of the top the shirt, and winking, mouthing "hey". And it may be that he thought that particular move would have inspired me to let him into traffic on the freeway, but really it just inspired me to want to take a hard-scrubbing shower.

Maybe if I had grown up in Oklahoma? Mississippi? Or more like maybe not ever.

disappointed.

boys are stupid. throw rocks at them.

not quite it
what I needed:
a cough drop or throat lozenge or whiskey or something to soothe my aching throat
what I was offered:
* gummy worms
* a glazed doughnut
* Dentyne Ice that was "cooler, longer"
* dog treats
* goldfish (not the crackers... the actual fish)

err, riiiiight. thanks.

necessary.
...FINALLY getting out to go dancing with the ever-fabulous Natalie... can you believe it took me a month and a half to get back out on the "how britty got her groove back" scene? how embarrassing.
evil.
...spending my Sunday working on my resume at my parents house because my own computer hates me. Boo to that.

and iiiiiiiiieeeiii want to thank you
I know that i often forget to thank people. Not on a daily basis "here's your change" "oh hey thanks" kinda way. But in a "wow, you didn't really need to do that, thanks!!" way. Take, for example, my family. They take care of me and I think i'm slightly spoiled by it. And that makes me have sad face. : ( But I love them and appreciate them very much. I just need to tell them more often. : )

back it up, yo
I'm not exactly what you would call an aggressive driver, but I do like to play tricks on those fools who are. There's not much I do if people are cutting me off, no point in getting upset about it. And if I cut someone off, I can guarantee it was an accident, and I'll try to apologize to the person as best I can. But if someone's tailgating me, it's over. My favorite trick if people are too close behind me is the "Wow! My windshield is suddenly incredibly dirty!" trick. To do this, simply spray your windshield excessively with wiper fluid, and turn wipers on medium speed. Going down the highway, the wind will pick up the liquid and spray it all-over the windshield of the car behind you. I can't tell you how much I enjoy that moment of satisfaction seeing the person back off and flip on their wipers to clean off their window. I also enjoy the "tapping on my brake" trick, just enough to light the lights but not enough to slow me down. That tends to freak people out enough where they realize they're too close. And never underestimate the power of boxing people in: pace a slower car next to you so the person can't get around you. Really this just ends up pissing people off so they get even more aggressive, but it's worth the giggle, I think.

every day is a story to tell
I guess I have absolutely no reason to complain about no guys interested in me. The other day I had grunting-man... oh yeah. As in yeah right. Yesterday I had the 85 year old in line in front of me to vote who poured on the compliments of "you have a great smile" and "your laugh is wonderful" and "you should be an actress"... and the sinker: "So... I have 2 questions: are you seeing anyone and do you like older guys?"

Shiver.

To add salt (lemon juice? lye?) to the situation, I found myself later recounting that and other creepy guy stories (book may be forthcoming!!) to a captive audience in Japanese class... including the cute (and has a girlfriend, dangit) boy. The love coming at me never ends, let me tell ya... And no, I don't want to cuddle.

b*star strikes back!
these days i find myself in the not-entirely-unfamiliar position of having to correct people on a number of issues. Not exactly a perfectionist, I've always been one to say a side word if I hear or see something a bit amiss. My anti-denim-on-denim stance is a great example of this. I will start out on the job-front in saying that "boughten" is not a word, as in "I know I've boughten at least 10 bags of dog food." C'mon people, I can't believe the quality of teachers in America is so low that teaching the past tense of bought as 'boughten', as opposed to "have bought" is standard practice. On the personal experience level, yesterday I found it necessary to put yet another creepy-guy in his place. Walking through the grocery store yielded me a rather unsubtle solicitous glance and grunt from a man standing in the check out line. He blatantly checked me up and down and made a quite audible "unh" noise, all of which prompted me to walk straight up to him, put my hand up in the one-finger scolding "no no no" position, and say right to his face "Uh-uh. Not cool, dude. Not cool." and walk away. Although that particular move may not be Miss Manners approved, it definitely should teach the guy that his particular method is not exactly appreciated. All the girls I know seem to like the solution, at least. And my mission is not yet completed, either. I am once again in the position of having to trap someone into a corner to give me an answer to a rendezvous I proposed 3 1/2 weeks ago... I don't actually mind what the answer turns out to be, but the fact that no answer has come for almost a month is just not socially acceptable. Etiquette police on patrol!!

like a 3 day hug
((contented sigh)), what a fab weekend. Hanging out with my peoples always manages to bring me back to myself in such a great way. Buying some new boots helps too. Darius came down on Friday and we spent Saturday frolicking about San Diego, just like old times. We had a little family reunion at Souplantation on Friday night with Amy and Larry, and on Saturday we helped to warm the house of Daniel and Ginette. Fun times ensued. Adding to the excitement was the fact that Kristy and I and my stuff from Japan were all reunited, and I spent the evening swathed in silk (i.e. the traditional dress of Vietnam that I had custom made for me when I was there) because of command modeling performance. Those Vietnamese really know what's up; I wouldn't mind all silk, all the time. It's like staying in your pajamas all day...and really, let's face it, there's nothing wrong with that! I got to hang with my sistie-ugler (she loves that nickname... more than that, ehem, other name we call her) and that's even better than being surrounded in silk and friends and tasty cocktails. Hard to imagine, but it's true.

I do wish I could have done more instant updates (and seriously makeover this site. Ick)... I need to get internet connection at home. But first I need to reformat my computer because Microsoft hates me or feels like I need more challenge in my life or i don't know what. I shoulda bought a Mac. I knew it then and i'm reminded of it now... I hang my head in shame for the disloyalty. But before I reformat, I need to get my files off the computer. And to do that, I need time. And THAT is where the problem lies, really. I suppose I could try to do it tonight, but instead I am choosing to venture once again into the dungeon of deadly allergens... also known as karate practice. Here's to hoping I don't get dizzy, pass out, or vomit!

sound advice
I love catching up with old friends, especially when they spout words o' wisdom like "at least you know who your friends are and who your pimps are." Well now that's true.

a lil' disturbing
there was a blood drive at Mesa yesterday, which is great! except for the girl walking by wearing a white "got blood?" shirt with red spots all over it. Uhhh....

Even more of a faux pas: wearing a jean jacket while you're wearing jeans. DENIM OVERLOAD here people. Resist! Resist!

It looks like I might be allergic to ALL salmon. Or else I have a stomach flu. MmmmmHmmm!
Despite Lis and Frank's objections, I ate my lunch of a salmon burger and now I'm yucky feeling... will I never learn?

And on a happy note: Boys named Matt are cute. Especially if they walk you to your car even if their motorcycle is parked on the other side of campus. It could just be that they don't want to risk saying no to you because of your mad karate skillz, but, then again, maybe chivalry isn't dead.