airport follies
the sd airport has a new fancy-schmancy terrorist-sniffing device that is a pimped-out version of your usual screening scanner beeping trellis that one has to walk through in order to board a plane. instead of emptying your pockets and crossing a threshold, this little unit has you stand under the arch while glass doors close in front of you to prevent you from rushing the starbucks that you can see just beyond the torturous routine. once all the green and red flashing symbols have settled down, the machine blows quick puffs of air all over your body. rather a fun little dance to watch, until you're the one in the sniffer and all sorts of alarms are set off, and you're corralled inside and everyone in line is giving you the eye for being so evil and the guards the thumbs up for being so patriotic and catching the dastardley criminal. the machine has detected suspicious chemicals, which of course means some giant lady finds it necessary, then, to run her hands all over you while 2 other guards go through your stuff and test out their witty pick up lines on you. 25 minutes (not bad, considering) you're released, and so are, presumably, you're chemicals, to finally get that cup of coffee and deal with your group of friends ragging on you until the end of time for being a threat to national security because you stink.

and then on the way back, your baggage shows up with all of it's handles gone. thick pvc/cloth straps shredded right off. AWESOME.