i'm like columbus, i discover so much
only at a pet-friendly company like mine can I sit at my desk and imagine that I'm part of the tympani pit of an orchestra as Black & Decker bang into the industrial metal furniture with their little plastic rollerballs.

Friday afternoon I came to the realization that I've forgotten how to hang out with people. Silly, isn't it? But as I was driving home from work, trying to think of how to pass the time from then forward, I decided to call Doc to see if he wanted to get a pizza and a movie and just hang. The other day I called Silvi to get boba, just because I wanted to talk to her. Sadly, I'm in awe that I pulled it off. When did it get built up in my head that I needed to book ahead, because impromptu was taboo when it came to social engagements? I truly believe that Japan had a big hand in this adjustment to thinking on my part, as it was nearly impossible to be spontaneous. Little discoveries of habits I've picked up from Japan always seem to shake my world just a little.

Saturday night I stayed home and painted my nails. Baby steps back into spontaneity.

Sunday was spent entirely in the karate world. I was drafted, along with 2 of my teammates and senpai, into working a table at a karate tournament up in Walnut, CA. Episodes like these reinforce that I am pretty sure I have some committment issues, and for the sake of my well-being, I like to limit them to karate. I will definitely step up and help out, but I am cautious about where I step; I’m terribly afraid that I’m just going to be ‘over’ it and lose interest and where’s the fun in that? Going to these tournaments is a big realization of this: the fun I have at practice is tucked away and not a glimmer of it cracks through the super-tough, focused mindset of my teammates. Training for these tourneys shadows them with the same attitude, and I’m expected to adopt a similar outlook. Well, that ain’t gonna happen, but unfortunately my different perspective leaves me stranded in the world of competitive karate. I don’t think people realize how different they become, most of that attributed to a sky-high stress level and thanks, but I’ll just say no. Keep in mind, all this could change... though I’m no longer toe-testing the waters, I definitely haven’t cannon-balled in.