taken for granted
i've had the opportunity to have the concept of family brought in to focus lately as i learn more about the actions of someone who seems to have no concept of it at all. i guess "family" is something that i never really thought about because i figured it was a shared experience: pretty much everyone's affiliated with one, whether or not they choose so. so what goes wrong in some cases? how is it that some people don't have the same sense of what the word means?
one of those kinds of people has lobbed a pretty serious bomb towards my family, something that technically has the potential of splintering households... and our reaction has been to laugh and say "bring it on". this person doesn't understand that not only can they not come between us, but when they take on one of us, they take on us all. in a way, i feel sorry for them for not being able to see that since they don't have the referential experience themselves. but, mostly, i just feel sorry that they have no family, and clearly never will, which makes me all the more grateful for my family. it's almost peaceful knowing that i have a family to take for granted in the first place.
current mood: seriously, don't mess.

a great reminder
today, my horoscope advises:

"Show up in the moment; it will never again come this way."

i sorta love that.
current mood: being in the moment

slowly, but surely
22 days in to the new year, and i'm making progress on the big elephant in the room of my resolutions (the potentially painful and definitely emotional one, in case you need a refresher). okay, maybe i can't say it's progress quite yet, but i already feel better about it, with my shoulders relaxing just a little, my sleep getting a little more peaceful, and that knot in my stomach more likely attributed to something i ate... so that's something.
current mood: hopeful

in the wrong room
while history was being made today, i was tap-tap-typing at work. ((sigh)) oh well.

happy inauguration day, and good luck, Mr. President.
current mood: there's a change about

OMG OMG OMG!
some of you will remember the not-so-tragic story of my favorite brown pumps sinking through the floor in nordstrom. in return for my duress, i was given the "golden ticket" of shoe opportunities, and last night i cashed in:

i had a lot of pressure about these shoes, mostly because my girlfriends saw it as an awesome opportunity to snag a pair of very expensive shoes. personally, i don't think i've ever had a pair of shoes cost more than $40, so it was a tough moral dilemma; i felt i was bilking nordy's out of money that wasn't mine while people were putting it into perspective of how much i could have made had i sued. so when i walked in yesterday and these little beauties caught my eye, i knew then and there the dilemma was done. a few nervous moments of approvals and authorizing phone calls, and nordy's is $300 lighter in merchandise.

of course i'll probably never wear them. i've ordered their air-tight display box already.
current mood: happy new shoes!

they are hikosawa family
i opened up my email today, and was met with a barrage of emails from my adopted japanese family. i cannot express how much i love getting emails from my foreign friends, because they are just SO DARN CUTE. it started back in the day with the turkish boy, who used to write in all capital letters so it seemed he was screaming to me from turkey. better yet, he started each email with the cute, but misspelled epithet of "SWEATY!", such as "HELLO SWEATY!" or "HOW ARE YOU SWEATY?!". as for my j-land family, i crack up when they dillegently assign the subject lines from whoever is writing the letter, such as "i am marica" or, in this case, the group effort of "we are hikosawa family". the accompanying letter had a narration of the pictures; tatoeba (for example):

No.1-6 Jichin sai (Ceremony)
In Japan, a lot of earthquakes occurs.
Therefore, we did the following ceremonies.
The Shinto priest had prayed to the god before starting the construction of the house.
God,save us from the earthquakes.
We bow to the god.
Then we drink sake in front of the altar.

letters like these make me so happy, and remind me of why certain things about japan are totally awesome (dear lord, i'm knockin' one back for you so you don't flatten my new house. thanks).
current mood: pen-pal-ish

resolutions: in one year & out the other
for the sake of the season, we can call these my "resolutions" for 2009. usually, i have date-specific goals going on for the year, but i suppose this year, a couple of my choices are more lifestyle changes that shouldn't end when the year does. ah, semantics. last year, i set out for vegas and vaginas, and this year, the goals are similar... kinda?
* as i previously resolved to donate my hair whenever possible, i have also resolved to be involved in the vagina monologues, however possible. this year, i'm playing a more behind-the-curtain part, as i am in charge of marketing and branding. the vday movement is something that really speaks to me, and i'm going to continue fighting for the end of violence against women across the world for as long as i can.
* incidentally, my hair will be donated this year as well. i'm about halfway there; look for a lighter hairdo circa the end of the year.
* but it probably won't be chopped off before THIS. like VMs, this is something i always have felt a calling to do, and i'm finally putting my time and heart where my heart is as a member of the crew.
* last, and probably most importantly, i've made a commitment to relationships, to communicate honestly and validate the people in my life. it's hard to explain how things got to this point... i've spent the last year or so as a shell of my former self, shut-down and swallowing what i really think or want to say. and that's not me, so time to shake it off and set things right. there are two major relationships that need some TLC pronto, or at least deserve some honesty and clarity, both qualities of which i am somewhat embarrassed to say i've been a little stingy on. and as painful as one or both repairs may be, they need to be done to bring me back to me... because i have missed me lately, and i'll bet you haven't been terribly impressed by the-me-of-late either.
so that's the plan for oh-nine. see you on the flip-side.
current mood: energized