ungh
i've been kind of out of it later, not pleasant. but don't worry, the witch doctor is somewhat hard at work brewing a happier, healthier britto. that is, when she's not playing with fire.
current mood: outta whack

refrain from impetuous conduct
i'm surprised i'm not in jail right now, or at least out on bail. saturday night downtown brought the usual booze and schmooze, but it wasn't until nat and i were talking to each other and the bartender when a hardly intoxicated man swaggered up to us and asked me point blank "are they real?"
now as much as you may think that's a common occurrence for me, i can think of maybe one other moment in my life where i was asked that incredibly offensive and invasive question. i responded to him simply, "why would you ask me that?", to which he replied "well, if they're real, they're fantastic." i understand the fool was laboring under the impression that he was paying me a compliment, so somehow i managed to not knock him into the bar, into his friends, or, as is common, punch him in the throat. i asked him how old he was, and followed it with "at what point in your 31 years of living did someone EVER pull you aside to let you know that it was okay to ask that?"
the point where he said that some ladies actually let him feel for himself made me stop and think for a brief second... maybe i should let him reach out in hope, and his invasion of my personal space would justify my kicking his ass. but instead, i turned to his friends and let them know they'd better keep their boy in check. i am impressed by my own control in the situation... which is probably a concerning thing altogether anyway.
current mood: um, exCUSE me?

a tinge of green
i recently read a little factoid mentioning the billions of wasteful items that come from the american morning coffee addiction: Each year, Americans throw away 138 billion straws and stirrers, 110 billion cups and 58 billion plastic utensils. so i decided to reduce my own carbon imprint on the world by a) using my own cup (despite the fact that we have nothing resembling a sink anywhere near our office, and thus have to resort to creative sanitizing), and b) pouring my cream and sugar in before the coffee to eliminate the need to stir it. a simple idea of convection, a harder habit to instill. the first day i thought to do this, i sleepwalked my way through pouring in the coffee, and then heading over to the fixin's to dress it up... all the time TALKING about my new outlook on coffee preparation. it wasn't until the last grain of splenda hit the cup that i realized the intent was there, but the practice... not so much. so i went back to my desk, doodled a reminder, and stuck it on my cup (it says "consider your footprint"). the next day, as i trekked towards the moment of truth, i reminded myself "cream & sugar first. cream & sugar FIRST." i proudly passed the canteens of coffee and poured half'n'half straight into the cup, followed by a small yellow packet or 2 of sweetness, and headed to the finishing "mixer" of coffee...
right concept, wrong proportions. i ended up with coffee flavored cream (as opposed to cream-flavored coffee), my mixture being almost white and sadly reminding me of the most horrendous date of my life ("hmm, it doesn't taste like milk..." "that's because it's half'n'half!!") which i won't go into here to protect the cuddler and my own sanity.
so i have a new quest to learn my ratios. it's fun learning new things about yourself, and lessening your carbon footprint on the world along the way!
current mood: think green... or else!

i wanna be a ho
a sentiment i have repeated a lot lately, but not a new sentiment overall in life. i have often thought that life would be easier if i was more ho-like. and being a ho, or more specifically, a prostitute, would almost surely guarantee that my life would inspire some sort of major dramatic production. think about it: les miserables, moulin rouge, miss saigon, rent, carmen, cabaret, pretty woman... all had a major role in promoting hookers. plus, i figure if you're a ho, you get a lot of action and don't mind the negative social connotations, because obviously to be able to hook up at random with little regard as to outcome or consequence, you have to be pretty dumb.

unfortunately, i'm not dumb. which may be why i'm single, and yet to have a musical written about me.
current mood: given the chance, though...

weekend recount
kisses received = 3
kisses received by dodgeballing firemen = 0
kisses received by drunk gay men = 3
... i guess beggars can't be choosers, right?
current mood: hmmm, oh well

on fie-yah
i have a 6-hour shift of dodgeball ref'ing scheduled for this sunday. the downside will be being in that smelly old gym for 6 freakin' hours. the upside? the cash? you'd think so. but try this: i'll be ref'ing the dodgeball portion of the california firemen's olympics. although it's sure to be entertaining, i'm a little concerned... a bunch of drunk firemen firing rockets at each other, with me in the middle? yikes.
current mood: this is going to be trouble

fruitilicious
i truly (heart) summer, when all of my favorite fruits decide to show up to the party at once. i must have walked out of the market with ten pounds of produce the other day, still missing a few items. maybe i seem to lose weight in these warm months because all i eat are berries, cherries, nectarines, plums, watermelon, pineapple... you get the picture. i like to think of it as a 3-month antioxidant blitzkrieg on my free radicals.
current mood: stomaches aside...

cue nostalgia here.
consider it downloaded...

in all it's 1985, pixelated, crazy-rabid rabbit and slow buffalo (but you can only carry 100 pounds back to the wagon) shooting, axle-breaking, river-fording glory.

aaaaaaaamen.
*by popular (ehem, lisa's) demand, here's where to get this for yo'self: click here for the game (download links at the bottom of the article) and click here for the apple //e emulator
current mood: yesssssss!

and boy are my fingers tired
well, it took a few days, but it's done. all my pics have been migrated over to flickr, so feel free to click here or tickle the "windows on my world" link to the right and catch up. oh, and i may or may not have spent all day thursday and most of friday cleaning it all up.
current mood: that's not narcissistic, right?

TODAY'S BIRTHDAY (July 5)
You're creating ease in your world, handling life with more grace than ever before. The relationships you add to your life in August give you energy instead of draining it. Also, you fix broken relationships. Business booms in March when you're brimming with profitable ideas. You share a solid connection with Aquarius and Pisces people. Your lucky numbers are: 5, 49, 24, 35 and 17.

so, 28 is here, without a whole lot going on, surprisingly. i'm foregoing my usual karaoke or other celebrations for some down time. mostly because most of the peeps i know are out of town this weekend. but should you find yourself overflowing with celebratory feelings, come join me at the beach on sunday, or for happy hour at rock bottom on tuesday afternoon. cheers.
current mood: festive

mr. and mrs.
the dust has settled, the champagne has run dry, and the weddingness is done. i will post more pics as soon as yahoo and flickr stop messing with my account, but for now, here are some highlights:

1/2 of the purple posse... and the rest of the bridal party


something borrowed ... and something new!


shout out to our japanese homies

this being my first wedding standing with the bride and groom, i was surprised about the celebrity-status i was suddenly vaulted to. i have permanent kiss marks on my cheeks from the number of family members pleased to have made my acquaintance. i was able to wrest the microphone so i could give a little speech for shannon's side (the matron of honor didn't give one, so i felt like i'd step up)... and although i was the only one able to hold myself together during the ceremony (barely), i wasn't so lucky at my speech... and apparently i made some other eyes wet too. i would also like to point out that i was the only one who stayed in my heels the whole night, suckers.
current mood: where there is love there is life.